Our guest blogger this week is Nicole Avery (aka Planning With Kids ). With five children aged 12, 10, 7 (only girl!), 5 and two, Nicole has managed to turn her blog into her job, thanks to phenomenal organisation skills. Fortunately for the rest of us, she shares her secrets in her book Planning With Kids, showing working parents how to become more organised - and leave more time for parenting. (Check it out here.) Today, Nicole talks about how to make more time for friends.
During July 2011, 671 women across Australia aged between 25-49 took part in a survey conducted by Ipsos Marketing. It looked at how women were spending their time and how they felt about their division of time. The survey was commissioned by Baileys and the report has some interesting findings: Only 5% of an Australian woman's week is spent with friends; 59% of women would go to the female friends for support; 70% of women would like to spend more time with their friends.
Of late I haven’t spent as much time as I would like with some of my closest friends. It isn’t because I don’t think my family can’t cope without me, but because I haven’t prioritised very well. Something a couple of friends and I have done recently to make sure we see each other more regularly is to book in a regular morning each month. Blocking it out in the calendar makes sure it will happen.
Every time I catch up with my girlfriends I feel recharged, connected and calmer. I have known them for so many years (one since when I was in kinder!) and they make me feel grounded no matter how crazy everything might be at the time. Love them lots – just need to see them more!
I did a quick calculation to work out what percentage of time I spend on my own interests. If you don’t include blogging, then it is about 7%, but I love blogging and spend some of my “work” time reading blogs etc so it is hard to determine if that is not part of personal interest too??? But in our house I think Mr A would only spend about the same amount of time on his personal interests as well. That is when he is not training for a really ridiculously long bike race, of course!
I know many women who feel this stress, but I have always had the support of my husband to make sure I take time out for myself. This time for me is at the gym and it has been the best way for me to manage the stress – because I do get stressed when I have looming deadlines, sick kids, personal commitments all happening at the same time.
Do you have the balance in your life that allows you to spend enough time with your friends?
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Discount clothes shopping - Does it really save you money??
Joanne is a Personal Stylist and consultant Brand Manager for small business, based in Sydney with over 20 years experience in the fashion industry, Contact Joanne for more info on Joanne.becker@bigpond.com
With the global financial situation still very precarious, our position in Australia is at the least nervous, as a result. Retail is taking a huge hit in response to this belt tightening, and most particularly Apparel. Not surprisingly children’s clothes are still selling well. With our children often being the only ones in the family really having any money spent on them when things get tough. This together with the fact that our kids never stop growing, so this elevates buying their clothes from the level of want to need!
The retail industry is now all about discounting incase you haven’t noticed? Every shopping center and mall is awash with discount offers, most notably the Department Stores. Some large retailers have changed their entire Brand proposition to be about price and being the lowest in the market. Clearly this is a smart business move and it allows customers to side step all the smoke and mirrors of confusing offers, and know that if they are shopping based on getting the lowest price alone, then that would certainly be the place to go. For things like children’s clothes that are grown out of this is perfect, but is this really the way to save money in the long run for you personally??
I am a firm believer in buying quality investment pieces, particularly for work. Over time these quality basics can be added to and expanded on with some on trend pieces thrown in to feel current and fashionable. These type of pieces don’t need to last and can be purchased from chain stores where it is all about disposable fashion. Your working wardrobe needs to work for you, it needs to breath and not crush and not shine after too many wears. This is only achieved when good quality natural fibres are used and garments are cut and made beautifully. In my opinion the temptation to skimp and buy cheaper clothes is a false economy as they won’t last nearly as well and will simply need to be replaced.
The smartest way to take advantage of the retail situation at the moment is to find a couple of stores where you really love their clothes and sign up to their email lists. I know it can be annoying to get lot’s correspondence but remember you can unsubscribe anytime. You will be the first to know about their direct VIP activity such as a category promotion ( i.e 30% off pants ) or even a total store event such as 20% off all stock for 2 days. These events are happening more and more at the moment and you can pick and choose what works for you. If you simply wait for the end of season sales you will not have your choice of sizes and the stock will be very picked over.
So there are some important things to think about when you hit the shops; Do I want to be wearing this for while or am I happy to replace it next season? Do I feel comfortable and great in this? Am I portraying the right message for myself in the work place wearing this? I know that things are tough at the moment for most of us particularly once you have recently added a child to the mix. I’m not suggesting sending yourself bankrupt on clothes outside your budget, however sometimes we can waste money by buying more of the wrong things and less of the best options.
With the global financial situation still very precarious, our position in Australia is at the least nervous, as a result. Retail is taking a huge hit in response to this belt tightening, and most particularly Apparel. Not surprisingly children’s clothes are still selling well. With our children often being the only ones in the family really having any money spent on them when things get tough. This together with the fact that our kids never stop growing, so this elevates buying their clothes from the level of want to need!
The retail industry is now all about discounting incase you haven’t noticed? Every shopping center and mall is awash with discount offers, most notably the Department Stores. Some large retailers have changed their entire Brand proposition to be about price and being the lowest in the market. Clearly this is a smart business move and it allows customers to side step all the smoke and mirrors of confusing offers, and know that if they are shopping based on getting the lowest price alone, then that would certainly be the place to go. For things like children’s clothes that are grown out of this is perfect, but is this really the way to save money in the long run for you personally??
I am a firm believer in buying quality investment pieces, particularly for work. Over time these quality basics can be added to and expanded on with some on trend pieces thrown in to feel current and fashionable. These type of pieces don’t need to last and can be purchased from chain stores where it is all about disposable fashion. Your working wardrobe needs to work for you, it needs to breath and not crush and not shine after too many wears. This is only achieved when good quality natural fibres are used and garments are cut and made beautifully. In my opinion the temptation to skimp and buy cheaper clothes is a false economy as they won’t last nearly as well and will simply need to be replaced.
The smartest way to take advantage of the retail situation at the moment is to find a couple of stores where you really love their clothes and sign up to their email lists. I know it can be annoying to get lot’s correspondence but remember you can unsubscribe anytime. You will be the first to know about their direct VIP activity such as a category promotion ( i.e 30% off pants ) or even a total store event such as 20% off all stock for 2 days. These events are happening more and more at the moment and you can pick and choose what works for you. If you simply wait for the end of season sales you will not have your choice of sizes and the stock will be very picked over.
So there are some important things to think about when you hit the shops; Do I want to be wearing this for while or am I happy to replace it next season? Do I feel comfortable and great in this? Am I portraying the right message for myself in the work place wearing this? I know that things are tough at the moment for most of us particularly once you have recently added a child to the mix. I’m not suggesting sending yourself bankrupt on clothes outside your budget, however sometimes we can waste money by buying more of the wrong things and less of the best options.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
It’s about integration, not balance
I was never particularly co-ordinated, but I just know that if I tried to work on my ‘work / life balance’ I would fall off. ‘Balancing’ motherhood and work suggests two things to me. One, that there is a perfect alignment that is ultimately achievable if only we tried harder. Two, that working is one thing and life is another.
Both statements are ridiculous.
For me, the best way to make it work is to accept that both parts of my life are important to me. Work is important because it’s part of my livelihood and my demanding job means that it’s often more lively than I’d like. My job will never come first to me (sorry job – never) but realistically I have an obligation to give it my all and it’s really hard to manage sometimes. How can I give my job my all when at least 50% of my brain is permanently focused on my family? I found this particularly hard when I first became a ‘working mum’ almost seven years ago. Everyone seemed to want a piece of me and some days my head was screaming under the pressure of being asked to give my all to too many things. There was just not enough all to go around, especially when there was no way I was giving less than 100% to my family... you can see the problem I have with ‘balance’. Thinking back on my early attempts at working and mumming, I’m surprised I didn’t go postal.
Over time I learned that the more I blurred the lines between ‘home’ and ‘work’, the easier it became for me. Fast internet and my iPhone (and my employer!) have allowed me to do my work wherever I need to and the same is true for organising my home life. I just get the job done, whenever, wherever. These days I base my success at work on outcomes, rather than the hours I work or how far I’ve climbed on some made-up ladder. I don’t care about my job title anymore, I just want to have interesting conversations and have the flexibility to give my family the 100% of me that they deserve. This wasn’t just handed to me by my company, of course. I had to work out what I wanted, go and ask for it, trial it and prove that I could do what I said I would. I have never looked back. These days I work four days a week – three in the office and Fridays from home. I also arrive late on a Thursday as I do reading in my daughter’s classroom until 9.45am. My work supports me because they know that I will deliver to my job specifications without interruption, issue or problem. I work independently and I just get the job done.
There are important parametres, of course. Aside from a quick email here or there, I haven’t ever tried to mind my children while I’m on the job. I have childcare throughout my working week, even on Fridays when I work from home because I don’t think trying to do both jobs at the same time is fair on anyone. My advice to mums who do work from home and are stressed to the max is to question whether you really can be committed to two full-time jobs that require your attention at the same time. Look for loving childcare alternatives to help you make it work. Or ensure your work knows that you will be working from the hours of 7pm until 1am or whatever works for you. Otherwise, you're really not doing either your babies or your work a favour and it's not fair on anyone. Especially your little ones because if you're anything like me you really like the work you do and can get totally absorbed in it – such that a little voice saying "Mummy can I?" becomes like nails down a blackboard and it takes everything you've got not to snap bile at your little needy dearheart for interrupting your day... yikes, I am showing my true colours here, I know.
Which makes you realise why I believe in the maxim "you can have it all, just not all at the same time."
Maxabella Loves working and mumming and combining the two as artfully as possible. I love making stuff. I love that I'm really bad at baking and sewing but I do them anyway. I love moving things around at home and organising everything far more than is strictly necessary. I love writing and curiosity and adventures. I love sitting down. I used to love sleeping , but the Tsunamis (my three children) cured me of that.
Both statements are ridiculous.
For me, the best way to make it work is to accept that both parts of my life are important to me. Work is important because it’s part of my livelihood and my demanding job means that it’s often more lively than I’d like. My job will never come first to me (sorry job – never) but realistically I have an obligation to give it my all and it’s really hard to manage sometimes. How can I give my job my all when at least 50% of my brain is permanently focused on my family? I found this particularly hard when I first became a ‘working mum’ almost seven years ago. Everyone seemed to want a piece of me and some days my head was screaming under the pressure of being asked to give my all to too many things. There was just not enough all to go around, especially when there was no way I was giving less than 100% to my family... you can see the problem I have with ‘balance’. Thinking back on my early attempts at working and mumming, I’m surprised I didn’t go postal.
Over time I learned that the more I blurred the lines between ‘home’ and ‘work’, the easier it became for me. Fast internet and my iPhone (and my employer!) have allowed me to do my work wherever I need to and the same is true for organising my home life. I just get the job done, whenever, wherever. These days I base my success at work on outcomes, rather than the hours I work or how far I’ve climbed on some made-up ladder. I don’t care about my job title anymore, I just want to have interesting conversations and have the flexibility to give my family the 100% of me that they deserve. This wasn’t just handed to me by my company, of course. I had to work out what I wanted, go and ask for it, trial it and prove that I could do what I said I would. I have never looked back. These days I work four days a week – three in the office and Fridays from home. I also arrive late on a Thursday as I do reading in my daughter’s classroom until 9.45am. My work supports me because they know that I will deliver to my job specifications without interruption, issue or problem. I work independently and I just get the job done.
There are important parametres, of course. Aside from a quick email here or there, I haven’t ever tried to mind my children while I’m on the job. I have childcare throughout my working week, even on Fridays when I work from home because I don’t think trying to do both jobs at the same time is fair on anyone. My advice to mums who do work from home and are stressed to the max is to question whether you really can be committed to two full-time jobs that require your attention at the same time. Look for loving childcare alternatives to help you make it work. Or ensure your work knows that you will be working from the hours of 7pm until 1am or whatever works for you. Otherwise, you're really not doing either your babies or your work a favour and it's not fair on anyone. Especially your little ones because if you're anything like me you really like the work you do and can get totally absorbed in it – such that a little voice saying "Mummy can I?" becomes like nails down a blackboard and it takes everything you've got not to snap bile at your little needy dearheart for interrupting your day... yikes, I am showing my true colours here, I know.
Which makes you realise why I believe in the maxim "you can have it all, just not all at the same time."
Maxabella Loves working and mumming and combining the two as artfully as possible. I love making stuff. I love that I'm really bad at baking and sewing but I do them anyway. I love moving things around at home and organising everything far more than is strictly necessary. I love writing and curiosity and adventures. I love sitting down. I used to love sleeping , but the Tsunamis (my three children) cured me of that.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
How (not) to have a sick day as a work at home mum
It's hard to have a day off when you're a work at home mum. I was out of sorts this morning. Tired, headachey, blah. I decided I'd call in sick, put my feet up and read a book. Of course.
I got home to my quiet house after school drop-off. I readied myself for a sick day. Coffee at hand. Book at hand. I got onto the sofa. I assumed the correct 'sick day' position.
Nothing doing.
I remembered the three emails I needed to send to follow up interviews for later in the week. I got up. I sent my emails.
I assumed the correct 'sick day' position.
Nothing doing.
I remembered a feature story I'd forgotten to begin. I got up. I went through my contact list. I sent emails requesting interviews later in the week.
I assumed the correct 'sick day' position.
Nothing doing.
I noticed the pile of towels at the end of the sofa, remnants from a frantic folding session the night before. They bothered me. I got up. I put the towels away.
I assumed the correct 'sick day' position.
Nothing doing.
I glanced at the clock. I remembered an interview was scheduled in 10 minutes time (hey, at least I remembered in my pale and wan condition). I got up. I wrote questions. I made a phone call. I made intelligent conversation.
I assumed the correct 'sick day' position.
I won't go on (well, not any more than I already have). You get the picture. I will say this, however. I feel better. And not because of the five minutes an hour I spent in the 'sick day' position. More for the fact that I will get to the end of the day knowing that, while I haven't done much, I've at least done enough to keep things ticking over. That's what it's all about, isn't it? The ticking over.
How do 'sick days' work at your house?
Allison Tait is a freelance writer who blogs at Life In A Pink Fibro about writing, being a work at home mum to two boys, and… whimsy. She was thrilled to work with Kate Sykes on their new book: 'Career Mums: A practical guide to returning to work' due out January 2012!
I got home to my quiet house after school drop-off. I readied myself for a sick day. Coffee at hand. Book at hand. I got onto the sofa. I assumed the correct 'sick day' position.
Nothing doing.
I remembered the three emails I needed to send to follow up interviews for later in the week. I got up. I sent my emails.
I assumed the correct 'sick day' position.
Nothing doing.
I remembered a feature story I'd forgotten to begin. I got up. I went through my contact list. I sent emails requesting interviews later in the week.
I assumed the correct 'sick day' position.
Nothing doing.
I noticed the pile of towels at the end of the sofa, remnants from a frantic folding session the night before. They bothered me. I got up. I put the towels away.
I assumed the correct 'sick day' position.
Nothing doing.
I glanced at the clock. I remembered an interview was scheduled in 10 minutes time (hey, at least I remembered in my pale and wan condition). I got up. I wrote questions. I made a phone call. I made intelligent conversation.
I assumed the correct 'sick day' position.
I won't go on (well, not any more than I already have). You get the picture. I will say this, however. I feel better. And not because of the five minutes an hour I spent in the 'sick day' position. More for the fact that I will get to the end of the day knowing that, while I haven't done much, I've at least done enough to keep things ticking over. That's what it's all about, isn't it? The ticking over.
How do 'sick days' work at your house?
Allison Tait is a freelance writer who blogs at Life In A Pink Fibro about writing, being a work at home mum to two boys, and… whimsy. She was thrilled to work with Kate Sykes on their new book: 'Career Mums: A practical guide to returning to work' due out January 2012!
Friday, September 16, 2011
Case study: Negotiating a pay rise while on parental leave
Recently, a CareerMums user asked about requesting a pay rise while on maternity leave. It was the second time she had been on maternity leave around the end of financial year when her work awards pay rises. She mentioned that she had not received a pay rise in quite a while and if she missed out again, she would be earning considerably less than her peers.
Our view on the issue is the following: Pay rises in general come with performance appraisals. If you have every intention of returning, your pay rate should account for the hard work you have carried out before going on parental leave. Ask to view their performance appraisal guidelines first so you have the facts. Then ask. If you don’t ask, you won’t know – or in some cases, you won’t get it.
We recently received feedback from this woman on how she then handled the situation:
"I just wanted to update you on my progress with asking for a pay rise while on maternity leave. I checked the policy and then organised a phone call with my boss. I indicated to him that I would like a pay review based on my (very good) performance review conducted at the end of last year before I went on leave. I was advised that this would be taken into consideration and I would be advised of the outcome. Yesterday I was advised that I would be awarded a 4% rise (slightly over CPI for the year I think) which I am quite happy with - though I think if I had been still working and had a full year's performance review to help make my case it would have been better - but it's definitely better than nothing! Thanks for your advice regarding this - it gave me the confidence to ask!"
Our view on the issue is the following: Pay rises in general come with performance appraisals. If you have every intention of returning, your pay rate should account for the hard work you have carried out before going on parental leave. Ask to view their performance appraisal guidelines first so you have the facts. Then ask. If you don’t ask, you won’t know – or in some cases, you won’t get it.
We recently received feedback from this woman on how she then handled the situation:
"I just wanted to update you on my progress with asking for a pay rise while on maternity leave. I checked the policy and then organised a phone call with my boss. I indicated to him that I would like a pay review based on my (very good) performance review conducted at the end of last year before I went on leave. I was advised that this would be taken into consideration and I would be advised of the outcome. Yesterday I was advised that I would be awarded a 4% rise (slightly over CPI for the year I think) which I am quite happy with - though I think if I had been still working and had a full year's performance review to help make my case it would have been better - but it's definitely better than nothing! Thanks for your advice regarding this - it gave me the confidence to ask!"
Reviewing your job description
How long since you or your manager has reviewed your job description? It is an interesting exercise that could produce the following results:
- Fine tuning exactly what your tasks and duties are. You may feel less overwhelmed and more focused on the outcomes. All of this has a impact on work life balance as it can help you to feel more organised about your work load.
- You may find an opportunity to build a case to work flexibly. For example, some components of your work may be done outside of work hours, or from home. Or there may be an opportunity to job share your role, or make it part time.
- Fine tuning exactly what your tasks and duties are. You may feel less overwhelmed and more focused on the outcomes. All of this has a impact on work life balance as it can help you to feel more organised about your work load.
- You may find an opportunity to build a case to work flexibly. For example, some components of your work may be done outside of work hours, or from home. Or there may be an opportunity to job share your role, or make it part time.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
work life balance and your relationship
When people talk about work/life balance, the focus is often on work versus family. Where does your relationship (love, togetherness and sex) with your partner fit in to the mix? So often it's easy to feel like ships passing in the night... We're looking for a case study for the Career Mums book (due out January 2012, through Penguin Books Australia). If you've got a story to tell about how your relationship fits in to your work/life balance - perhaps you went through a rough patch and found your way through, or perhaps you and your partner have a terrific plan for making it work - then we'd love to hear from you! We can change your name if that makes it easier to talk. Email kate@careermums.com.au
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)